A Year To Save My Life

1st January 2013

"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear" -  Nelson Mandela

 
So my sister uses the word 'fat' alot. And this is regarding herself. She seems to be forever saying "I don't want to get fat". As someone who is fat and has faced all the negative aspects of it, this really makes my blood boil. I can understand that she doesn't want to get fat but she is so preoccupied with how she looks. She is an attractive, intelligent woman who has alot going for her and yet, she seems to focus on the physical. A male friend of her has even said to her that the sooner she accepts herself in a positive way, the happier she will be. I couldn't agree more.

She watches a lot of programmes re weight loss such as MTV's 'I used to be Fat' and 'Obese: A Year To Save My Life'. I don't mind this as I find it inspiring and notice alot of the behaviour that I have in common with the participants. Since starting running, I procrastinate less, make less excuses and have a bit more positive thinking in terms of my achievements and abilities. I feel more positive about this year and that can only be a good thing.

It is obvious from watching these programmes that the only way to lose weight and stay slim is to identify your triggers and your bad habits. I feel that I did this with one of my first entries as I understand that the emotional side of things is just as important.

(And Mum's a nosey bitch as she's just asked what I'm typing. And I've just replied that I've typed that my Mum is a nosey bitch).

As I was saying - it is surprising how much this helped and I continue to look for negative behavioural patterns or moments of self-sabotage.

In order to continue with the positive thinking and achievements side of things, I have set myself two goals. The first is to run all of and complete 'The Adidas 10k Forest Trail Run' that is in May. 'Race for Life' was a huge disappointment for me, as I didn't enjoy it and I had to walk most of it due to my asthma. The 10k will not be the same.

My cousin also got engaged on Christmas Day and they are looking at planning the wedding for 2014 which gives both of us a chance to lose some substantial weight (my cousin is also very big). I have told her about P90 and P90X and will be giving her the videos in a bid to help her reach her goal. It would be so great to be shopping for a dress and being excited about the choices that are available to me, instead of ending up depressed because of the lack of choice due to my size. I am seriously tempted to treat myself to an Alexander McQueen dress. Maybe I should browse and get an idea as to what I want to wear?

I also have the goal of being able to comfortably fit into a plane seat as I am planning on visiting my sister for this year's Christmas. That gives me just under a year to lose 5 stone, which is a do-able target and will bring me down to 13 stone.

Here's to 2013 and I'll be going for my first run of the New Year tomorrow!